Cultivating A Little Brat

Looking at kids, I often feel complexed feelings. There are some sayings about children. “A child is a mirror of an adult”. “A child is shaped as what and how parents teach and educate”…and so on. One also said, “Do not expect children to be innocent and pure but look at them how much they act nasty and cruel like little brats. You would see all kinds of dirty and messy scenes from their playing like grown ups”. I often notice that honestly.

Once they are so cute and lovely but I also find out the real basic instincts from their acts as a human. Sometimes I am confused what is the difference between humans and animals whenever I see their uncultivated real faces. An adult is obviously a cultivated figure through lots of socializing and training for a long time. The difference is that adults know how to express their hidden desire wrapped with sophisticated manner and masks not to be blamed by others while children reveal it wide open without any shame, guilty feeling, or hesitation.

A child before cultivation does not know about right and wrong or good and bad. He or she totally follows their instincts and does whatever they want. Adults could call them rude and spoiled but they are just honest with their true feelings as they do not have any filters in their brain and followed actions by that. Actually cultivating a human is also mostly about inserting lots of customs and taboos that a society has built. Who could guarantee the society trains and educates children right as it is changed and all different by time and places in every country?

Children often ask me why they should not do certain acts or saying but mostly I also do not know the answer clearly but happen to force them to follow my order because it could be out of control in my guess. Losing control is the worst situation I could imagine around me.

Reminding my childhood, I just feel amazed how they could be so free and liberal to talk whatever they want as I could have just kept silence afraid of disciplines from teachers and parents. I think they know too much information from Youtube and internet these days.

Yet, kids could be very vulnerable to be exposed to violence and abusing as they are not fully capable to express their thoughts and recognize what is going on around them. Thus adults have obligations to protect them enough from harmful environments because certain incidents might affect on their whole life and mental health.

Though it is also true that lots of bullying or abusing things are conducted under the name of principles or disciplines as some news shows. I often hear that some parents teach their kids using sticks or physical punishment if it is needed. Also kids say some teachers often hit part of their body to train them and their parents are acceptable with that. This makes me very uncomfortable and assume that it would be far away for kids to have their proper rights as a kid in some countries.

Honestly, I also feel hard to control my emotion when a lousy kid acts rude and impulsive. It is always a huge challenge for me to talk to them without losing temper and patience in certain situations. Regardless, adults should be acknowledged with the limit of disciplines what to do or not to do. Otherwise, it only gives a bad influence on children and it can not be the ‘Education’ anymore.



Recently, I am very interested in minimalism. The thought came out when I looked into my closet which was full of clothes but I still could not have enough of it every in the morning although I bought it once in a while. You have it enough and buy it enough but you still don’t have it enough. I don’t know what this really means.

As I had clean the stuffs in my space, it seemed like the endless closure. I had sold, shared and thrown things away but another thing constantly came out again and again from somewhere. I could see my infinite desire and obsession clearly through those materials. The products I bought whenever I had felt emptiness and vagueness and tried to fulfill it with things but could not succeed after all.

This time, I have determined myself I would not make same mistakes and be very cautious to set up my space again. Then it is another joy and needs some creativity not to fill it with some clumsy garbages. First, I would empty my bedroom with nothing but only bed blankets. Next, I have no idea yet what to do with a living room area though because I also not get used to the too empty place. I feel nervous and strong gut to fill the area with things. I searched on some You tube channels about minimalism styled living rooms but it still seems with overly items. As I could move to another place, I do not want to struggle again with heavy moving stuffs. I would not possess a thing if it is a burden to remove.

Do I need to spread some rug sheets on the floor and leave it as it is as an exercising or meditation spot? Or do I need a comfortable desk and chairs for reading or dinner space at least? I may need that small luxury in that case. A comfortable couch is definitely tempting but I used to feel stress with the huge space consumption of it so must skip for that. I would definitely not buy a TV this time for sure. Or I may need the screen on the wall to watch You tube or internet vods. It could be wonderful if it is a bit big like a small home theater.

Buying an old camping car and fixing it is the best option but I don’t know how to drive and fix it so it would be better delay as the next project. Until then I may need a small truck to come and go. It is hard not to drive as I am almost a blind in direction. I mostly take a walk over an hour and turn around a whole town for five minutes destination.

For cooking stuffs, I only need a stainless pan and a small cattle. I would not buy tons of sources and plates as it always bugged my nerves whenever I had opened the shelves before. The kitchen was the last place I gave up to tidy up so another person did it instead of me when I moved in and out. It would not happen again this time. I would rather choose to eat out if I have to buy stuffs for cooking.

Nevertheless, I would may need a small electronic cooking pot which could make tons of dishes with a few buttons and it seems real practical. Other than that I would not buy anything really. My seven boxes have not arrived yet from the old place so I would consider to buy anything after that if I really need things.


4. 자긍심 Self-Esteem

You are all you’ve got…

책 ‘여성에 관한 명언집’ <러닝 출판사> 중에서

번역 <유앤아이 출판사>

From the book ‘The Quotable Woman‘ by RUNNING PRESS

Translated by UNI Publishing

먼저 자신을 사랑하면 다른 것은 순조로워진다. 이 세상에서 무엇을 하든 당신은 진정 스스로를 아껴야 한다.

루실 볼

Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.



당신이 누구인지를 받아들이기 전까지는 스스로 지닌 것에 결코 만족할 수 없다.

도리스 모튼

Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.



한심한 것은 아직 미숙하면서 숙련된 척 하는 것이다. 사랑을 갈구하면서 필요없는 척 하거나, 훨씬 잘 할 수 있는 일인 걸 알면서 단순히 즐기듯 여유부리는 것 말이다.

도리스 레싱

What’s terrible is to pretend that the second-rate is first-rate. To pretend that you don’t need love when you do; or you like your work when you know quite well you’re capable of better.



실패를 심각하게 받아들이지 않는 것은 그것들을 더 이상 두려워하지 않는다는 의미이다. 스스로에 대해 웃어 넘기는 법을 아는 것은 상당히 중요하다.

케서린 맨스필드

When we begin to take our failures nonseriously, it means we are ceasing to be afraid of them. It is of immense importance to learn to laugh at ourselves.



나의 존재를 교정하려는 남자는 필요없다. 가능한 가장 깊은 관계는 우리 존재들을 잊는 것이다.

셜리 맥클레인

I don’t need a man to rectify my existence. The most profound relationship we’ll ever have is the one without ourselves.



. . .너무 많은 이들이 무엇을 소유하고, 입고, 어떤 집에 사는 지, 그리고 어떤 종류의 차를 모는 지로 스스로를 정의한다 . . . .당신을 카르띠에 시계를 차고 헤르메스 스카프를 한 여인으로만 여긴다면, 집 안의 화재는 재산 뿐만 아니라 당신 자체를 무너뜨릴 것이다.

린다 헨리

. . .So many of us define ourselves by what we have, what we wear, what kind of house we live in and what kind of car we drive . . . .If you think of yourself as the woman in the Cartier watch and the Hermes scarf, a house fire will destroy not only your possessions but your self.



다른 사람들의 성격에서 보이는 뚜렷한 흠결과는 전혀 달리, 내 자신의 것에 대해 곰곰히 생각할 때면 결점들이 서서히 희미해지고, 시시하고, 오히려 별 것 아니게 된다.

마가렛 해슬리

Whenever I dwell for any length of time on my own shortcomings, they gradually begin to seem mild, harmless, rather engaging little things, not at all like the staring defects in other people’s characters.



자신에게 너무 몰두하면 과하게 차려입게 된다.

케이트 하버슨

If you are all wrapped up in yourself, you are overdressed.



자신에 관해 타협하지 마라. 당신이 갖고 있는 전 재산이다.

제니스 조플린

Don’t compromise yourself. You are all you’ve got.



모두가 알아야 할 궁극적인 교훈은 타인 뿐 아니라 자신도 포함한 조건없는 사랑이다.

엘리자베스 커블로-로스

The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.



타인이 아닌 자신에게 귀 기울여라.

거트루드 스테인

Let me listen to me and not to them.



전문가는 당신에게 자신의 예상치를 말할 수 있다. 하지만 스승은 당신 본연의 기대치를 이끌어낸다.

페트리샤 닐

A master can tell you what he expects of you. A teacher, though, awakens your own expectations.



인격은 천천히 형성되지만 무너지는 것은 순식간이다.

페이스 볼드윈

Character builds slowly, but it can be torn down with incredible swiftness.



당신의 생각을 점령한 적과 싸우는 것은 쉽지 않다.

샐리 캠튼

It is hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head.



평등 중의 하나는 남성과 동등한 대접을 받는 것이 아니고 당신이 남자를 대하듯이 본인을 대우하는 것이다.

말로 토마스

One of the things about equality is not just that you be treated equally to a man, but that you treat yourself equality to the way you treat a man.



일할 때 나만의 목소리로 절로 내는 흥얼거림을 참을 도리가 없다.

뮤리엘 스파크

I see no reason to keep silent about my enjoyment of the sound of my own voice as I work.



당신의 동의없이 누구도 당신을 초라하게 만들 수 없다.

엘리노어 루즈벨트

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.



우리는 각자 이야기 속 영웅들이다.

메리 맥카시

We are the hero of our own story.



제 멋대로 생각하라. 하지만 항상 자신을 가장 염두에 둬라.

도리스 레싱

Think wrongly, if you please, but in all cases think for yourself.



당신이 진실을 마주하기 전까진 그저 혼란스럽다.

펄 베일리

You never find yourself until you face the truth.



성인은 오직 성인에게만 납득된다.

파멜라 핸스포드 존슨

Sainthood is acceptable only in saints.



인생은 워낙 견고해서 사건들이 그 예측을 하지도, 할 수도, 맞추지도 못 할 것이다.

샬롯 브론테

Life is so constructed, that the event does not, cannot, will not, match the expectation.



나는 자주 겸양을 키울 틈이 있으면 한다 . . . 하지만 나에 대한 생각만으로도 너무 바쁘다.

에디스 시트웰

I have often wished I had time to cultivate modesty . . . But I am too busy thinking about myself.



분노는 당신의 눈을 정면으로 응시한다. 그녀는 권력 불나방들에 별 감흥이 없고 처치법을 안다. 그 용기는 비통을 두려워하지 않고, 그녀는 대상이 확실치 않을 때 조차 간구하기 마다하지 않는다. 그녀가 걸음을 뗄 때 외로움에서 고독으로 가는 길을 선택한 것은 분명하다. 사람들이 내게 그녀가 단호하다고 한 것은 거짓이 아니었다. 단지 그녀가 친절하다는 것을 빠뜨렸다.

J. 러스 젠들러

Outrage looks you straight in the eye. She is not impressed with power trippers, and she knows first aid. Courage is not afraid to weep, and she is not afraid to pray, even when she is not sure who she is praying to. When she walks it is clear she has made the journey from loneliness to solitude. The people who told me she was stern were not lying; they just forgot to mention she was kind.



나는 그 여행이 이제껏 경험한 여정 중 최고이길 바란다. 우리 자신으로의 탐험.

셜리 맥클래인

I hoped that the trip would be the best of all journeys: a journey into ourselves.



타인이 내가 어떤 사람이 되기 바라는지 알아차리도록, 그리고 그렇게 되기 위해 자라났다. 남의 시선으로 나를 평가하지 않도록 꽤 오랜 시일이 걸렸다.

샐리 필드

I was raised to sense what someone wanted me to be and be that kind of person. It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes.



무언가가 아닌 누군가가 되기로 할 때 얼마나 많은 배려들을 잃는가.

코코 샤넬

How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something, but to be someone.



나는 애늙은이 것이 항상 신경쓰였다. 만일 나의 이런 차이점이 후일 자산이 될 수 있다는 걸 알았다면 어린 시절 고민이 훨씬 덜 했을 것이다.

배트 미들러

I didn’t belong as a kid, and that always bothered me. If only I’d known that one day my differentness would be an asset, then my early life would have been much easier.



당신은 한 때 거침없었다. 고분해지지 말라!

이사도라 던컨

You were once wild here. Don’t let them tame you!




3. 일과 성공 Career and Success

It can let the nice things come out…

책 ‘여성에 관한 명언집’ <러닝 출판사> 중에서

번역 <유앤아이 출판사>

From the book ‘The Quotable Woman‘ by RUNNING PRESS

Translated by UNI Publishing

성공은 당신을 둘 중 하나의 여정으로 이끌 수 있다. 당신을 프리마돈나로 만들거나, 혹은 험난한 것들을 순조롭게 하고, 위험한 것들을 제거하며, 좋은 일들이 생겨나게 한다.

바바라 월터스

Success can make you go one of two ways. It can make you a prima donna, or it can smooth the edges, take away the insecurities, let the nice things come out.



쥐 싸움에서의 문제는 당신이 설사 이겨도 여전히 쥐 밖에 안된다는 점이다.

릴리 톰린

The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.



일은 당신이 의지하고, 신뢰할 수 있는, 평생의 – 항상 당신 곁에 있을 – 친구이다.

마가렛 버크-화이트

Work is something you can count on, a trusted, lifelong friend who never deserts you.



나는 고된 일 없이 정상에 오른 사람을 알지 못 한다. 그것이 비결이다. 정상까지 항상은 아니어도 꽤 가까이는 이끌 것이다.

마가렛 대처

I do not know anyone who has got to the top without hard work. That is the recipe. It will not always get you to top, but should get you pretty near.



아무도 재능만 갖고 성공할 수 없다. 신은 재능과 일머리를 주었고, 일은 재능을 비범하게 만든다.

아나 파블로바

No one can arrive from being talented along. God gives talent, work talent, work transforms talent into genius.



당신이 스스로 얻은 명성은 당신에게 부여된 것과는 사뭇 느낌이 다르다.

글로리아 밴더빌트

The fame you earn has a different taste from the fame that is forced upon you.



성공하기 위해 해야 할 첫번 째는 당신의 일을 사랑하는 것이다.

마리 로레타 수녀

To be successful, the first thing to do is fall in love with your work.



내게 성공이란 열 개의 최상급 멜론들을 먹으면서 각각 위만 살짝 맛 보는 것이다.

바브라 스트라이샌드

Success for me is having ten honeydew melons and eating only the top half of each one.




2. 행동, 성취, 그리고 열망 Action, Achievement, And Ambition

They went out and happened to things

책 ‘여성에 관한 명언집’ <러닝 출판사> 중에서

번역 <유앤아이 출판사>

From the book ‘The Quotable Woman‘ by RUNNING PRESS

Translated by UNI Publishing

모든 심각한 도전은 내부로부터 시작된다.

유도라 웰티

All serious daring starts from within.



당신이 무언가를 해야 할 시점은 아무도 그것을 원치 않을 때, 저마다 불가능하다고 말할 때 이다.

마리 프란시스 베리

The time when you need to do something is when no one else is willing to do it, when people are saying it can’t be done.



행동은 좌절에 대한 해결책이다.

조안 배츠

Action is the antidote to despair.



각자 자신만의 안전지대가 있다—조깅하기, 그림 그리기, 수영, 낚시, 수 놓기, 정원가꾸기. 다만 활동 그 자체보다는 자신의 역량 강화에 집중하는 것이 더 중요하다.

Each person has his own safe place—running, painting, swimming, fishing, weaving, gardening. The activity itself is less important than the act of drawing on your resources.



당신이 할 수 있다면 할 수 있는 것이고 할 수 없다면 그 역시 옳다.

마리 케이 애쉬

If you think you can, you can. And if you think you can’t, you’re right.



어떤 이는 무엇을 해왔는지를 전혀 못 본다. 오직 무엇이 이루어져야 하는 지를 본다.

매리 커리

One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done.



비관론자는 항성들의 비밀을 발견하거나, 미지의 영역을 항해하거나, 혹은 인간 정신의 새로운 영역을 개척할 수 없다.

헬렌 켈러

No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit.



미래를 볼 때 너무 눈이 부셔서 눈이 멀 지경이다.

오프라 윈프리

When I look into the future, it’s so bright it burns my eyes.



당신이 무언가 되는 일에 너무 늦은 때란 없다.

조지 엘리엇

It is never too late to be what you might have been.



당신이 그것을 할 수 있다면 왜 해야 하는가?

거트루드 스테인

If you can do it then why do it?



인생은 살아 가는 것이다. 당신 스스로를 위한다면 흥미로울 일을 찾아 나서는 것이 낫다. 단지 앉아서 자신에 대해 걱정하고 있을 것이 아니라.

케서린 헵번.

Life is to be lived. If you have to support yourself, you had bloody well better find some way that is going to be interesting. And you don’t do that by sitting around wondering about yourself.



삶에서 당신이 이루어낸 것들 보다 더 실질적인 것은 없다 . . .가차없이, 돌이킬 수 없게 끝낸 일들.

사라 티스데일

There’s nothing half so real in life as the things you’ve done . . .inexorably, unalterably done.



만약 해야할 일이라면 하라. 운명이나 나를 잘 모르는 누군가의 손에 맡기지 말라. 자신을 가장 잘 아는 이는 본인이다. 한 번 심호흡하고 전진하라.

애니타 베이커

I say if it’s going to be done, let’s do it. Let’s not put it in the hands of fate. Let’s not put it in the hands of someone who doesn’t know me. I know me best. Then take a breath and go ahead.



예전에는 모든 위험을 무릅쓰고 결과가 좋지 않음에도 결국 생존한, 그 어느 때보다 요즘 우리에게 필요한, 훨씬 대담한 여성들이 있었다.

게마인 그리어

There have been women in the past far more daring than we would need to be now, who ventured all and gained a little, but survived after all.



나의 어머니는 성취와 성공사이에 구분을 두었다. 그녀가 말하는 성취란 최선을 다해 열심히 공부하고 일하는 것이다. 성공이란 다른 사람들에게 칭찬을 받는 것인데 그것 역시 좋은 일이다. 하지만 성취보다는 덜 중요하고 만족스럽다. 항상 성공보다는 성취에 집중해야 한다.

헬렌 해이즈

My mother drew a distinction between achievement and success. She said that achievement is the knowledge that you have studied and worked hard and done the best that is in you. Success is being praised by others, and that’s nice, too, but not as important or satisfying. Always aim for achievement and forget about success.



내가 오랫동안 주목한 성취를 이룬 사람들은 거의 주저하는 일 없이 무슨 일이든 했다는 것이다. 그들은 뛰어들었고 일은 이루어졌다.

엘리노어 스미스

It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and happened to things.



이상주의자들 . . .바람에 주의를 기울일 정도로 아둔해서. . .인류를 발전시키고 세상을 풍요롭게 해왔다.

엠마 골드먼

Idealists . . .foolish enough to throw caution to the winds. . .have advanced mankind and have enriched the world.



모든 이가 재능이 있다. 다만 그 재능을 쫓아 힘든 시기를 견디는 용기는 흔치 않다.

에리카 정

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent to the dark place where it leads.



당신은 언제, 어떻게 죽을 지 결정할 수 없다. 오로지 현재, 어떻게 살 지만 결정할 수 있다.

조안 베츠

You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live. Now.



무릎을 끓고 사느니 선 채로 죽는 편이 낫다.

돌로레스 이바루리

It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.



실패한다면 실망할 일이지만 시도하지 않는다면 불행한 일이다.

비버리 실즈

You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don’t try.



만약 당신이 과거에 무엇을 이루었는지에 머물러 있다면 그것은 더 이상 발전이 아니다. 나는 계속 전진한다.

레슬리 카론

I think it’s the end of progress if you stand still and think of what you’ve done in the past. I keep on.



나는 부자가 되기를 갈망하지만 부를 쌓기 위해 하는 짓은 전혀 하고 싶지 않다.

거트루드 스테인

I do want to get rich but I never want to do what there is to do to get rich.



어제는 도전하기 위해 애썼고 오늘은 승리하기 위해 도전한다.

베네디트 데블린

Yesterday I dared to struggle. Today I dare to win.



높이 날아 올라야 할 때 결코 바닥을 기고 있을 수는 없다.

헬렌 켈러

One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.



우리는 보통 아버지 탓을 하고 형제, 자매들, 그리고 학교와 선생들을 탓해야 한다고 알고 있다. 누구를 비난하든 어느 경우에도 스스로를 원망해서는 안된다. 결코 당신의 잘못이 아니다. 하지만 또 역시 본인 때문일 수 있다. 실제 변화를 원한다면 당신이 그 변화시킬 당사자이기 때문이다. 아주 단순한 것 아닌가?

케서린 헵번

. . .We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers—you can blame anyone, but never blame your self. It’s never your fault. But it’s ALWAYS your fault, because if you wanted to change, you’re the one who has got to change. It’s as simple as that, isn’t it?